March 12th, 2018

Who do you know my pain?
I know my pain only me.

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My childhood, I moved for my father.

Then. I didn't know me how hard it is.

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I thought i am happy.
because I had my parents in my side and they loved only me.
so, I thought "I am fun to meet new my friends"

but, It was not.
I saw my mind and know true.
The then I was sad and very tired everyday.

I remeber it. only that memory..
I efforted to make my friends for me.
I remeber making friends that rather then study.
I scared to being my alone.
It was my pain and sadness.

so, i didn't stop to continue efforted for my friends.
Then. I am 20.
I thought i should.

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"I have to effort for my friends.

If I effort them, they will like me forever. therefore i must run."

so eventually,
I didn't win to myself and very tired and fell down.
I  released my friends from me.

I wanted to easy my mind.

When i think about my childhood, i often cryed.

because i was poor in my mind always.

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I lost my way but, got calm my mind.
I lost my friends but, got happy my mind.

Sometimes lonely but It's ok.
I difficult to meet friends now but It's ok.

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I want to said to me.

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 "I'm sorry in childhood. Did you hard?

I know you how much harded it is.
it's ok now. you should take a rest now. "​

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"Now I will hug you. Don't move. now i wil do."
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It will be okay. Don't worry.​
I believe me.
I need time.

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but I don't blame them.
I love my parents in the world best.
because I know to they were very tired and difficult more than i. 

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